Maelstrom Games
by Eberhardt
Summary: Reality has tied itself into a knot. And it did it the moment Naruto died, when he wasn't supposed to. This has complicated matters. Now, while that's being fixed by people more skilled than himself, Naruto is told to waste a few millennia, by using a jury-rigged system that turns life into a videogame. The alternative being 'Get Erased from Existence' he agrees. VideoGame!Fic


**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Glaxy, which is referenced, is also not mine.**

**A/N: Yes, another VG!Fic. Mostly came about as a bit of a tribute Majin hentai X and his Naruto: Game of The Year Edition, which was recently abandoned. While not a fic I'd say is of the highest quality (Sorry, Majin, but I try and judge all fics to a high standard) it was nonetheless one I greatly enjoyed and was still of a higher quality than mot other fics on this site. **

**I also stated writing this as a form of stress relief. This fic won't be held to a higher standard as my other fics will, meant mostly as something I can write without worrying overly much about quality. (This is mostly in relation to plot/ideas and character interaction ad pacing, not the technical quality. If you see spelling mistakes and typos, please tell me) A kind of Guilty Pleasure to write. That's all this fic is meant to be. So I'll probably write this when I don't feel like being stressed by constantly editing my other fics. Though I'll be honest, my update rate is horrendous. Expect updates to come when they come, no promises.**

**If you enjoy it, well, enjoy. If not, well, you don't need to read it if you don't want to.**

* * *

**Prologue**

'_Hey, Kurama?'_

'_**What, brat?**_'

'_Is this supposed to be what death is like?'_

'_**The fuck do I know? I've never actually died.**_'

That was a good point. If I was dead, why in the hell was Kurama still inside me?

Meh. Not like that was the weirdest thing going on right now. No, that special spot was currently held by the great big, stylized, red letters floating in the air in front me. If I wasn't mistaken, and man did I hope not, because not even my reading comprehension could be bad enough to not know how 'Game Over' was spelled.

I let out a huff of air. Why couldn't my life be normal? Or was it afterlife, now? Bah, semantics! The important thing here was that I had died and woken up to a Game Over Screen. Personally, Videogames weren't my thing, I preferred a good game of poker or something, but I'd still played a few every now and then. Enough to know the angry red letters were probably a bad thing.

Which fit, considering I'd just gotten killed by Madara. Man that guy was strong.

A thought struck me and gave the hovering words a glare. Was I being mocked?

'_**Of course you're being mocked. Who **_**wouldn't** _**mock you? You're an idiot.**_'

Ignoring that, that I took a moment to look around. Yep, nothing but a large blank void, except for the damn letters. Man, if this was the afterlife, it sucked.

Speaking aloud, because it's not like there was anyone here to look at me like I was crazy for talking to myself, I asked Kurama, "So, what do we do now?"

Someone clearing their throat and responding with a "I believe I can answer that," startled me and I turned around with a kunai in hand. Of course, the moment I got a look at who had startled me, I got a reaction from Kurama.

'_**Old Man?!**_'

Wait, if that Kurama was calling the floating old guy with horn on his head 'Old Man,' that meant…

"Sage of The Six Paths?"

I took a moment to take in the form of who was revered as The Most Powerful Man to exist (Or was that 'to have existed?) and as the God of Shinobi. Honestly, he looked pretty old, but I knew appearances could be deceiving. Old Man Hokage was enough evidence of that. Really, what most drew my attention were the horns and the red, Rinnegan-like marking on the middle of his forehead.

Oh, and he was floating in a sitting position over the ground. Or what I thought was the ground. Kind of hard to tell, when it was mostly just a blank void.

Another grunt drew my attention, as the Sage spoke once more, "Honestly, I prefer Hagoromo."

Huh. Okay then.

Speaking tentatively, I asked, "So...you said you tell me what was going on?"

Hagoromo nodded, as he said, "There have been disturbances in the wash..."

"The wash?"

"The space-time wash," He said.

I nodded, and then cleared my throat. "Are we talking about," I asked cautiously, "some sort of laundromat, or what are we talking about?"

"Eddies," said Hagoromo, "in the space-time continuum."

"Ah," I nodded, "is he? Is he?" I pushed me hands into the pockets of my pant and looked knowledgeably into the distance. Yeah, i had no idea what he was talking about.

"What?" said the Sage.

"Er, who," I asked, "is Eddy, then, exactly, then?" Seriously, it was strange name.

There was silence, and I could hear the sound of Kurama smacking his paw into his face in the back of my mind. I could swear I heard a mumble from the Sage, something along the lines of 'Oh yeah, just like Ashura.'

After a few more moments of The Sage glaring balefully at me, and me feeling like an idiot, Hagoromo finally let out a sigh.

"It seems I have to dumb this down a bit. Alright, so, you know what the Universe is, right?"

I gave him a look, stating quite clearly, that I wasn't some kind of idiot.

The sound of Kurama resorting to bashing his head against a wall, instead of just using a paw was easily ignored, as I waited for the Sage to continue.

For his part, Hagoromo was still giving me a look as if he wasn't sure he believed I knew or not. Which was totally unfair. Just because I had no ideas who 'Eddy' was, or what laundromats had to do with anything didn't mean I had no idea what the Universe was supposed to be. That was basic stuff!

Finally, the Old Sage sighed and gave up, continuing where he left off.

"Anyway, this Universe is not the only one. There are, indeed, an infinite amount of them. Some simply a different iteration of our current one, or maybe one that is wildly different, having different laws and rules of the world. These can range from tiny things, such as simply being born with a different hair color, or something larger, such as there being no such thing as Chakra.

"This making sense to you?"

I simply give a nod of confirmation. It was easy enough to understand and he phrased it in an understandable way.

"Okay, so, sometimes these Universes will have a...hiccup, or two. They'll collide with each other, which usually isn't a problem as such things are brief, as they'll bounce apart as quickly as they collide. However, there has been and...incident. A great many different Universes all collided at once, bouncing into and off each other enough times and quickly enough that they may well have been the same Universe for a single, indefinable moment.

"Now, even this wouldn't have much effect, besides a few ripples here and there. Maybe a couple unlucky people fell into an entirely different Universe, or into the Void that separates them, to endlessly waste away in the unforgiving dark, but that's it. Or it would have been. It seems that the collision also messed with the predetermined Timelines of a select few Universes, resulting in a few deaths of key people that should not have happened. Of these, even fewer are of a select kind of person, those whose presence in the Timeline is absolutely necessary."

Alright, my head was starting was to hurt.

"Alright, let me see If I've got you right. Basically, all these different Universe mashed up against each other, and caused a bunch of chaos for a single moment, that most wouldn't even register. And this also messed with the Timelines…?"

I think I was right on that last one, anyway. Despite myself, it still came out sounding like a question.

"Basically, yes."

"But wait, why would the Timelines only be messed up if certain people died at the wrong time? Wouldn't that be true if anyone died at the wrong time?"

If my admittedly subpar knowledge of how Time worked was to be trusted, anyway. Sure, I'd had to dig up some of my hazy memories of training with Ero-Sennin, when he'd occasionally go on rants about Sealing that I never really paid any attention too, but I'd still picked a couple things up. I think.

Still, it appeared I was wrong, as the Sage sighed, "If Time worked in such a logical manner, then yes, you'd be right. However, the truth of the matter is that sometimes there are people who just end up having a greater impact on the world no matter what they do. Almost all Universes have built-in failsafes for instances in which a person just suddenly dies when they ought not have, such as subtly nudging another into doing the things that person would have, as well as the things they would have done if that person had lived. Kind of having someone, or more often than not, some_ones _take up the burden of the deceased's existence.

"But as I said, some people just have so great an effect on the world no matter what, to the point that the Burden of their Existence can not be shunted off to others. When such a person dies, heavier measures are taken. Resurrection by Divine Intervention, the person's soul being kept safe until it can find a new vessel, the very revision of Time itself, there are a myriad of ways it can happen. And that's simply if Time acted in a linear or strict manner.

"This brings us to the ultimate point of this discussion. You are such one person and have died when you were not supposed to. Usually easily rectifiable, matters have been complicated. You have died at the exact moment in which our Universe was in contact and overlapping a great many others. The result...is not pretty. It's as if near all Universes relating to you and even some that don't have been tangled together. And with you dead and in need of resurrection, the fail-safes have all gotten confused and are trying to pull you into every Universe at once.

"At the recommendation of another who is skilled in matters of Alternate Realities, a system has been created to help...untangle things. This has resulted in something of one, giant Universe that resembles something akin to the shape of a pretzel knot. Technically, all of the Tangled Realities are dormant, for lack of a better word, giving way only to the System, which is uniquely in a near state of constant malleability and flux. It constantly copies parts of a Reality to itself, then destroys it. At least, while not in use, anyway. When in use, or a 'New Game' is started, things become more defined and stable. To keep you and the other several people from being torn apart at the seams and erased from the entirety of Existence, you'll each be put in different parts of the System, separate from each other.

This should keep things together while those of us who are of more of use work to undo all of this chaos. Though I'll warn you, this could take a very long time."

"...How long are we talking?"

"Several millennia. At the least."

"So basically, to keep everything from exploding, and so as to keep existing -something I very much want to keep doing- I need to play a game."

"Pretty much."

"Then why didn't you just say that!"

In return, all I got was a sigh, as Hagoromo pinched the bridge of nose in exasperation.

'_**Oi, dumbass, ask the Old Man how this stupid Game will work.'**_

Eh, heh, yeah...That'd be a good idea. I was just about to head off and get it all under way, but it couldn't hurt to know what to expect.

"So, uh...Kurama wants to know how this Game thing will work, anyway."

"To be entirely honest, I'm not completely sure on the specifics. I'm not the one who set up the system. I do know that it will change -or rather, Define- Reality around you as you continue through. Such as, if you were to gain a bonus to Intelligence, you would immediately be more capable of higher thought processes."

"Huh?"

"You'd immediately feel smarter and think better."

"Ah, gotcha."

"Of course, the reverse is also true. There are various ways to temporarily or permanently decrease what I'm told is called 'Stats.' So if you got hit in the head hard enough, it might temporarily slow down your thinking.

Really, if you want more specifics, I'd just check the manual. Or look out for the 'Tutorial.'"

"Alright, sound easy enough. I've played a couple videogames before, so this shouldn't be too hard to get the hang of. probably best to get started, though."

"Yes, quite. If you stay here any longer, you may be in danger of Nonexistence."

Well that was alarming. Why didn't he say that before?! In a bit of a panic, I turned back to the giant red letter and said, "Next! Continue! New Game! Plus One Life!"

One of those must of worked, because the letters disappeared, along with the Sage. Words also forced themselves into my head, things like 'New Avatars Unlocked,' 'New Origins Unlocked,' 'New Starting Feats Unlocked!' I raised a hand to my head, as the words caused a bit of a sharp pain and opened my eyes. I'd shut them in reaction to the unexpected pain, and as they opened, I found I was now in a black void, instead of a white one, with new giant hovering words. Looking at them, I saw they were the typical fare for this kind of stuff.

**New Game**

**Options**

**Help**

**Extras**

I was about to get on with it and start a New Game, but a grumble from Kurama had me spend a few minutes in Options and Help. Options was fairly simplistic, asking about whether I wanted to use the HUD, and Subtitles, as well as stuff I didn't touch like Point of View. I did make sure the Tutorial was set to 'on,' though. Help was simply a way to contact a 'Moderator' -which I guessed was someone who knew about all this Tangled Reality stuff, like The Sage of Six Paths- in the event of a 'bug.'

Fairly standard stuff really.

As I selected New Game, and got this shit started, I had a thought.

_I wonder who those other guys The Sage mentioned were in the same position as myself, are?_

* * *

_Omake 1: The Other Schmucks 1_

"What?"

"_Look, it's not my idea. Blame the idiot who created it. It doesn't matter. You've still got use this System."_

Edward Elric couldn't help but frown at that. Honestly, he was still having a hard time believing it and he probably wouldn't if it came from anything else. For currently in front of him, before a large stone gate, was the blank white outline of a figure, only defined by shadows who's only purpose seemed to be making it possible to actually see the figure.

This figure was what he had come to know as the closest approximation of the being called 'God.'

So yeah, when he told you something, it was usually best to listen. Though usually all you got was cryptic statements and vague advice. Which made it kind of alarming that he (it?) was being pretty blunt, in this particular instance.

"I don't know. Having to re-go through my life a myriad of times, sounds too good to be true. What about Equivalent Exchange? Pretty much everything I know says it shouldn't be possible. And that's without going through all the moral implications of literally treating life as a game."

"_Equivalent Exchange has no place in this circumstance. if you must, look at it as the World making up for something that should not have happened. Really, the chances of this happening are indescribable to your human mind. Literally. You cannot comprehend the odds of this happening. _

_Besides, the laws of a bunch of Realities are in flux right now. If I'm right, 2 plus 2 currently equals cow to the power broccoli. Don't ask me how, but it makes perfect sense."_

Edward gave a sigh, as he flexed his mechanical arm, his shoulder joints starting to ache a bit.

"So, basically I just have to waste time until everything is fixed, then I can get back to my original reality? I'm assuming none of my skills will carry over to a...'New Game' I think you called it? And vice versa, none of the skills I aquire there will tay with me when I return."

"_Pretty much yes. Also, I suggest getting on with it. You're still at risk of being torn to shreds, until you get passed the Game Over screen."_

"Man, this is gonna be such a pain in the ass. i don't even have Al here with me to complain to."


End file.
